CZT
More than anything else.
For all the lost words trapped between my teeth and underneath my tongue

Lately in between studying (mostly getting distracted, i dk wtf is wrong w me), i'll go onto the internet and sometimes randomly and by some fortunate chance, i'll manage to discover some really inspirational speeches and videos that took place particularly at university colleges' graduation ceremony.

To sum it up, most of them (speakers, some famous, some not so) talk about the importance of finding out what you really want. They speak about not working, but rather doing what you love because that's what you're going to spend the next 40 odd years on and that's what's going to keep you alive. Others range from how we shld not settle for anyone else's expectations other than our own because at th end of the day, we are living for ourselves and also how we shld not take comfort in being mediocre and average.

Each of all these are so thought-provoking and left me w so many things to think about at night before sleep, where these thoughts are mixed and jumbled w formulas, equations, definitions and terms swimming around in this seemingly-filled-but-nowhere-near head before i fall into a deep slumber. It's almost a routine
I know myself better that im one who's willing to trade change and maybe even opportunities for familiarity and comfort.
But th qn to ask now is, do/will i want to start altering my mindset?

I'm 18. Still too young to be called old. But is all these thinking and stressing a process of growing up? So when do we stop growing up?
Ppl always say you'll have to keep searching and one day you'll find what's right and best suited for you, be it in love or vocation or just about everything else.
Although im 18, but i choose to believe i'm one of the lucky few to say that my search for love is thus far, complete. And i hope it stays that way. But what i wanna do in future, what i'm going to do is somehow a piece of blank. Yes i know, it means it's not my time yet.
Surely, one can ponder.

Forget about all the incoherent rambling above, maybe it's just stemmed frm the fact that im graduating tomorrow. Jc only what, it's not like i'm going to be thrown into the wilderness called society tomorrow right?
But srsly, isit weird to feel no sense of attachment to a sch you're w for 2 years. The 2 yrs that have zoomed right past me almost caught me by surprise.
2 wks left to As. Note how im saying this is in an exceptionally calmed tone. Because ive sort of just left it for somebody up there to decide for me. As a fallible human being, i'll also try to play my part by working hard. And hope for the very best.
This is one behaviour that th speakers as above-mentioned is intolerant of but there's really nt much options left ):

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